SweatyShirts
Backroom, Cashier, Hardlines, Instocks, TL Wannabe
- Joined
- Apr 7, 2017
- Messages
- 70
This isn't a thread for advice or anything, just really soaking in how far I've come in the past 6 months and letting myself be proud of that for a moment.
At the end of December I took my first job in retail as a Dayside Backroom TM. Now I've worked entry level jobs in almost all other major industries in the 9 or so years of my adult life, even was a live-in caregiver for people with disabilities or extreme medical conditions. But overall I never made it anywhere beyond being a low-level employee.
And on top of that I'd managed to exceed the 300lb mark and then some, at my heaviest I was just shy of 340lbs.
I wasn't and still am not proud of what my life was and the lack of any meaningful achievements.
Getting back to my job here at Target; looking back there's only 2 times I've ever been scolded or had even just a slightly negative conversation with a TL regarding my job performance (2nd time being just a few weeks ago actually). Looking back I had a good sense about what I needed to do or how I needed to do things and I executed on that.
But when I took this job, I didn't see things that way. I figured that because this was my retail job that I was screwing up right and left with everything I did but because I was on the 90 day probationary period I thought everyone was simply sitting back and taking notes of how I was messing up. Making a paper trail to justify firing me.
I had absolutely no sense of self-worth, no confidence in anything I did. And so I sought validation over and over again, asked dumb question after dumb question. And everyone around me picked up on that and responded exactly how you think they would. Suffice to say there wasn't a lot of support and the hours I was getting were shit, think 12-16 hours per week for the first 3 months or so.
I wouldn't have been able to make it if it weren't for the money I'd set aside while I was caregiving. Living rent free meant I had virtually no bills.
I even remember the first time I got 15 or so feet up on the wave, that thing had this slight wobble that just left me a nervous wreck for a good 15 minutes. Yeah I had a slight fear of heights that didn't help. The guy training me really just didn't have any words when he saw my expression as I got off that thing. But I digress..
Thanks to my time as a live-in caregiver, I didn't have any coworkers for a number of years. I lived with the people I worked with, the people I cared for. And so coming into this new work environment, I was socially awkward as all hell. Fuck I still am to a degree.
My point is things were truly bleak in a number of ways, in a lot more ways than I've already said and even as I'm writing this, I don't entirely know I came back from that place.
Just a stubborn will I guess, a dogmatic drive to be better.
Fast forward to now; in the past 3 months I've worked 2 seperate 14 day runs without a day off, with the vast majority of my weeks being 6 day work weeks. On top of that amount of work, I've also managed to cross-train into Hardlines and Cashier while also (mostly) excelling in those roles and I'm set to start Instocks training next week and then Market team soon after with talk of a probable promotion to either GSA or PA
On top of that, my STL has taken notice and directly gotten involved in developing me for a Team Lead position in the future as well as having set in motion most of my cross-training. I had been asking my direct TL to clear room in my schedule for cross-training for 2 months now and trying to work with TLs in the other workcenters to make it happen but to no avail. It wasn't until my STL heard about my desire to promote that things really started moving.
So, in seeking feedback on my growth in the past month alone since she's started challenging and pushing me, she feels I've just been crushing it and has said my growth has been just absolutely impressive. And has went so far as to name me the top performer in the store.
In talking to her, I've expressed a desire to at the very least have Bench placement by the end of the year and she believes that's absolutely feasible. Still gonna keep on the throttle and try to make it happen as soon as possible.
Oh and I've dropped 55lbs in the time I've been here. Still got a ways to go but last time I was at this weight was when I was playing football/basketball and lifting weights. This is the best I've felt in years.
Obviously I don't like to think too highly of myself and I tend to make a point of staying humble going so far as to block out being proud of my hard work. So that's what this is for, just giving myself a moment to reflect and feel good about the hard work and growing I've been doing lately.
Thanks for reading!
At the end of December I took my first job in retail as a Dayside Backroom TM. Now I've worked entry level jobs in almost all other major industries in the 9 or so years of my adult life, even was a live-in caregiver for people with disabilities or extreme medical conditions. But overall I never made it anywhere beyond being a low-level employee.
And on top of that I'd managed to exceed the 300lb mark and then some, at my heaviest I was just shy of 340lbs.
I wasn't and still am not proud of what my life was and the lack of any meaningful achievements.
Getting back to my job here at Target; looking back there's only 2 times I've ever been scolded or had even just a slightly negative conversation with a TL regarding my job performance (2nd time being just a few weeks ago actually). Looking back I had a good sense about what I needed to do or how I needed to do things and I executed on that.
But when I took this job, I didn't see things that way. I figured that because this was my retail job that I was screwing up right and left with everything I did but because I was on the 90 day probationary period I thought everyone was simply sitting back and taking notes of how I was messing up. Making a paper trail to justify firing me.
I had absolutely no sense of self-worth, no confidence in anything I did. And so I sought validation over and over again, asked dumb question after dumb question. And everyone around me picked up on that and responded exactly how you think they would. Suffice to say there wasn't a lot of support and the hours I was getting were shit, think 12-16 hours per week for the first 3 months or so.
I wouldn't have been able to make it if it weren't for the money I'd set aside while I was caregiving. Living rent free meant I had virtually no bills.
I even remember the first time I got 15 or so feet up on the wave, that thing had this slight wobble that just left me a nervous wreck for a good 15 minutes. Yeah I had a slight fear of heights that didn't help. The guy training me really just didn't have any words when he saw my expression as I got off that thing. But I digress..
Thanks to my time as a live-in caregiver, I didn't have any coworkers for a number of years. I lived with the people I worked with, the people I cared for. And so coming into this new work environment, I was socially awkward as all hell. Fuck I still am to a degree.
My point is things were truly bleak in a number of ways, in a lot more ways than I've already said and even as I'm writing this, I don't entirely know I came back from that place.
Just a stubborn will I guess, a dogmatic drive to be better.
Fast forward to now; in the past 3 months I've worked 2 seperate 14 day runs without a day off, with the vast majority of my weeks being 6 day work weeks. On top of that amount of work, I've also managed to cross-train into Hardlines and Cashier while also (mostly) excelling in those roles and I'm set to start Instocks training next week and then Market team soon after with talk of a probable promotion to either GSA or PA
On top of that, my STL has taken notice and directly gotten involved in developing me for a Team Lead position in the future as well as having set in motion most of my cross-training. I had been asking my direct TL to clear room in my schedule for cross-training for 2 months now and trying to work with TLs in the other workcenters to make it happen but to no avail. It wasn't until my STL heard about my desire to promote that things really started moving.
So, in seeking feedback on my growth in the past month alone since she's started challenging and pushing me, she feels I've just been crushing it and has said my growth has been just absolutely impressive. And has went so far as to name me the top performer in the store.
In talking to her, I've expressed a desire to at the very least have Bench placement by the end of the year and she believes that's absolutely feasible. Still gonna keep on the throttle and try to make it happen as soon as possible.
Oh and I've dropped 55lbs in the time I've been here. Still got a ways to go but last time I was at this weight was when I was playing football/basketball and lifting weights. This is the best I've felt in years.
Obviously I don't like to think too highly of myself and I tend to make a point of staying humble going so far as to block out being proud of my hard work. So that's what this is for, just giving myself a moment to reflect and feel good about the hard work and growing I've been doing lately.
Thanks for reading!
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