Mental health help for SO?

[Starr90]

How can I add my SO to get help.
My SO is stressing me the F out. I think he may be schizophrenic but I can't find somewhere to get help. I've called and emailed 3 different organizations with no reply. He thinks he hears people thoughts in his head. He thinks he's talking to their subconscious. And it's definitely getting to the point it's affecting me mentally. Because he'll accuse me of cheating. He'll accuse me of "thinking" of other men's genitals and he'll get verbally abusive. He spends all day "talking" to people. So when ever I want to vent to him or just talk I don't even know if he's paying attention to me because he'll just keep muttering to himself.

I called the hotline for myself and was told I needed to add him but since I was in a really bad mental state that day I didn't get a chance to ask how to do that. I've checked the pay n benefits website but I don't want to accidentally add him wrong. I keep thinking what if I something happens to me and any benefits meant for my kids go to him (he's not their dad).
In this mental state he has been so irresponsible with our money that we are struggling a lot.
I know it's only 5 free sessions but his mom said if she has to work for the rest of her life just to get him help then she would.

 

[IhateOPmodel]

How can I add my SO to get help.
My SO is stressing me the F out. I think he may be schizophrenic but I can't find somewhere to get help. I've called and emailed 3 different organizations with no reply. He thinks he hears people thoughts in his head. He thinks he's talking to their subconscious. And it's definitely getting to the point it's affecting me mentally. Because he'll accuse me of cheating. He'll accuse me of "thinking" of other men's genitals and he'll get verbally abusive. He spends all day "talking" to people. So when ever I want to vent to him or just talk I don't even know if he's paying attention to me because he'll just keep muttering to himself.

I called the hotline for myself and was told I needed to add him but since I was in a really bad mental state that day I didn't get a chance to ask how to do that. I've checked the pay n benefits website but I don't want to accidentally add him wrong. I keep thinking what if I something happens to me and any benefits meant for my kids go to him (he's not their dad).
In this mental state he has been so irresponsible with our money that we are struggling a lot.
I know it's only 5 free sessions but his mom said if she has to work for the rest of her life just to get him help then she would.

There are criteria for someone to be added to your health insurance when you aren't married. It's actually considered a domestic partnership, I'm not sure as to the specifics but I had a similar issue before I got married. I think some of it is, living together for X amount of years and filing a joint tax return/claiming one or the other as a dependent etc. I don't think you can just add your boyfriend of a few months to your policy. Also I'm not sure but in that case I think you could only add him under the open enrollment period unless there is a legal change such as marriage.

As far as your benefits from Target, go on to pay and benefits and add beneficiaries. I'm sure if you get insurance for yourself and children they should already be on there and you can decide how much of your death benefit goes to which child etc.

 

[Hardlinesmaster]

Your local city & county family services can help you too. You might have to make a decision to let his mom decide on guardianship. You might have to work more hours during 1st qtr to keep benefits up.

 

[Starr90]

There are criteria for someone to be added to your health insurance when you aren't married. It's actually considered a domestic partnership, I'm not sure as to the specifics but I had a similar issue before I got married. I think some of it is, living together for X amount of years and filing a joint tax return/claiming one or the other as a dependent etc. I don't think you can just add your boyfriend of a few months to your policy. Also I'm not sure but in that case I think you could only add him under the open enrollment period unless there is a legal change such as marriage.

As far as your benefits from Target, go on to pay and benefits and add beneficiaries. I'm sure if you get insurance for yourself and children they should already be on there and you can decide how much of your death benefit goes to which child etc.

We've been together for more than 1yr. And have a baby together. Unfortunately he gets paid under the table in construction so he hasn't filed his taxes. This will be his 1st year. I encouraged him to start his own business but that he had to do everything right. His mom paid for him to register his business and my dad actually helped him get his tools but with his state of mind it's been up and down and I've been the one having to pay for things for the jobs he gets. Like for supplies and gas. But I can't keep that up. We're struggling.

 

[Starr90]

Your local city & county family services can help you too. You might have to make a decision to let his mom decide on guardianship. You might have to work more hours during 1st qtr to keep benefits up.

Only place i haven't gone is the county health department. I've gone to the ER they said he has to voluntarily go in or the police.
He was getting aggressive with me one day so I thought that was my chance and called the police. They arrested him for domestic violence and said there would be a nurse to evaluate him. But I've been arrested before. It's just yes or no questions. So obviously they didn't do anything. He spent 3 days in jail and he kept calling up his mom telling her that I was gonna hurt the baby or that I was gonna go abandon her in a dumpster.
We wanted to wait till his court date to go in front of a judge to have him committed but the wait time for that was at least 6 months. He's out on bond. But now my parents want me to leave him because you never one if he'll try to kill me one day. Or hurt my kids. Which makes me even more desparate to get him help ASAP 😓

 

[Karen Potts]

Since no one here is stating the obvious, I will: LEAVE. None of this sounds safe, normal, or healthy.

 

[Tessa120]

Since no one here is stating the obvious, I will: LEAVE. None of this sounds safe, normal, or healthy.

I agree. This is dangerous. Love him from afar until he fixes himself.

We've been together for more than 1yr. And have a baby together. Unfortunately he gets paid under the table in construction so he hasn't filed his taxes. This will be his 1st year. I encouraged him to start his own business but that he had to do everything right. His mom paid for him to register his business and my dad actually helped him get his tools but with his state of mind it's been up and down and I've been the one having to pay for things for the jobs he gets. Like for supplies and gas. But I can't keep that up. We're struggling.

I made the mistake of encouraging the man in my life to start his own business. Don't give him gas money. Don't give him additional money above and beyond the starting supplies. You don't want to be at the point of throwing money into a black hole that will never hold enough. If he can't make it work, don't give another cent.

But now my parents want me to leave him because you never one if he'll try to kill me one day. Or hurt my kids. Which makes me even more desparate to get him help ASAP 😓

You can love someone from afar. And sometimes afar is the safest place to be.

If he is as ill as reported and it's not an exaggeration on his part to control you, get away so you and the kids are safe. Because he is making a choice to not try for adequate treatment, and that choice to not try is not fair to you and that choice to not try may even be dangerous to you. It is ethically all right and lovingly all right to tell him that he has to make a choice to get treatment and stick with treatment before you can share a roof. That he has to make a choice to be as well as possible so that you can have a safe, gentle, secure and loving home.


Something to consider pricing, marketplace insurance open enrollment is right now. Without that, the health department should be able to get him outpatient help of some type. But the ball is in his court, he has to choose help.

 

[DBZ]

I also say leave him. Getting help has to be his choice. He can go to the ER and talk to the doctor. Maybe after he is properly medicated, you can entertain being around him again, but people also tend to go off their meds when they are feeling good.

 

[Frontlanegirl]

@Karen Potts Beat me to it. LEAVE HIM NOW! Right now you need to focus on keeping your kids safe. Only he can get the help he needs if he wants it. You might look into therapy yourself as to why you are making excuses for him. If he was getting aggressive with you and threatening you then you need to get an order of protection.

 

[Yetive]

I agree that the time has come for him to help himself while you help yourself and your kids.

I will add that TMLR will cover 5 counseling sessions for you and 5 for each of your kids (not sure of their ages).

 

[Starr90]

The thing is he doesn't even think he needs help. He thinks is a super power.
He thinks I can do it too and a lot more other people. Or that other can fly. He used to think he made people mind readers by being near him. Now I'm not sure. But he keeps saying his mom does it. He says he talks to my dad (he lives in another state).

& I already am leaving. He's actually been living from his gym bag because I had kicked him out. But he didn't leave and since he lives here the police can't force him. I'd have to take it to court. Which is taking forever to set dates. That's why I wanted to see if I could find help through target. But I already have a place to go just slowly packing up.

He knows he needs to see someone but in his mind he says it has to be some one to teach him to control his powers or to turn them off. Which he doesn't want but he know the options I gave him.

 

[Tessa120]

The thing is he doesn't even think he needs help. He thinks is a super power.
He thinks I can do it too and a lot more other people. Or that other can fly. He used to think he made people mind readers by being near him. Now I'm not sure. But he keeps saying his mom does it. He says he talks to my dad (he lives in another state).

& I already am leaving. He's actually been living from his gym bag because I had kicked him out. But he didn't leave and since he lives here the police can't force him. I'd have to take it to court. Which is taking forever to set dates. That's why I wanted to see if I could find help through target. But I already have a place to go just slowly packing up.

He knows he needs to see someone but in his mind he says it has to be some one to teach him to control his powers or to turn them off. Which he doesn't want but he know the options I gave him.

As someone who has a serious mental illness and goes through mild psychosis on a regular basis, I am telling you to please, please get the hell out, because this is a very, very bad situation and you could get hurt. Even if it means living in a motel for a while. Cut ties completely and disappear completely. He cannot control what his sick mind is telling him and he sounds unwilling to face that his mind may not be perceiving truth and unwilling to fight the symptoms.

 

[Frontlanegirl]

The thing is he doesn't even think he needs help. He thinks is a super power.
He thinks I can do it too and a lot more other people. Or that other can fly. He used to think he made people mind readers by being near him. Now I'm not sure. But he keeps saying his mom does it. He says he talks to my dad (he lives in another state).

& I already am leaving. He's actually been living from his gym bag because I had kicked him out. But he didn't leave and since he lives here the police can't force him. I'd have to take it to court. Which is taking forever to set dates. That's why I wanted to see if I could find help through target. But I already have a place to go just slowly packing up.

He knows he needs to see someone but in his mind he says it has to be some one to teach him to control his powers or to turn them off. Which he doesn't want but he know the options I gave him.

What you need to do is bigger than what Target can help. You need to get away and keep your kids safe.