Dealing with a sociopathic boss

Joined
Feb 17, 2019
Messages
37
I was so happy with my job a month ago, but now I am working in a completely different area. There is a supervisor that seems to want to run me into the ground and get me to quit. I work harder than everyone else to try to appease her, but she expects me to finish a Uboat in even more ridiculous amounts of time. I am working myself completely to the bone. If I work two days in a row on those shifts, god help me. I have a hard time getting out of bed.
She is the only person at my store that I seem to have a problem with and I have no idea why. Everyone else loves me, but she seems to hate me and is determined to make my life hell. I am losing hope in target because of one person... She never treats her peers and higher ups likes this, she is charming to them. She is the definition of "toxic boss" through and through.
Oh, and my reward for doing good is "go drink some water" because I am obviously dehydrated and sweating like crazy... I don't bother doing that... I don't have time.
 
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Black Sheep 214

Kiss no butts, give no fox
Joined
Apr 27, 2018
Messages
1,177
Sounds like my old store and my old boss or there’s been some cloning going on. Sorry to say this scenario doesn’t usually end well for the victim. Unless you have benefits with Spot or the job market is tight in your area, you might want to start looking around for a better job with less stress, better leadership and better opportunities. Good luck.
 
Joined
Oct 10, 2017
Messages
385
How fast does she expect you to push a uboat?

The standard is push one case a minute, plus backstock and trash and whatever else is extra time (I factor 5 minutes per 20 cases for cleanup and guests, and on average it is reasonably close.) That standard is, IMO, fair for well sorted vehicles.

I have team members that think twice the standard is hard...so I'm cynical.
 

commiecorvus

Former Signing Ninja
Staff member
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Jun 10, 2011
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16,344
With female bosses, if you are hotter than them, it can be a huge issues.
Do you speak from experience?
Did you have huge issues with a female boss because you were just too hot?
Did your milkshake bring all the boys to the yard?
Is this all female bosses?
Do you have to be a lot hotter or just a little hotter?
Are woman incapable of being professionals or do you just have an issue with them?
 

Humble TL

Timers Please!
Joined
Apr 30, 2017
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2,209
Do you speak from experience?
Did you have huge issues with a female boss because you were just too hot?
Did your milkshake bring all the boys to the yard?
Is this all female bosses?
Do you have to be a lot hotter or just a little hotter?
Are woman incapable of being professionals or do you just have an issue with them?
Yes to all of the above.
 
Joined
Sep 17, 2018
Messages
117
I've seen this boss many times over. There is one in my building now, though she recently moved from front end to softlines, so out of my hair to a degree. On one notable occasion, there was an issue at Guest Service with a complicated return. I forget the exact scenario, but it was one of those bizarre things that a team member might see once or twice a decade. I called for a GSA, and got her instead. The moment she got there, she more or less pushed me out of the way, not even giving me the opportunity to explain the situation. The way she spoke to me in front of the guest made it sound like I was incapable of doing even the simplest task without supervisory intervention. Of course, after making the guest re-explain the whole situation, while I was now assisting other guests to alleviate the line she was creating, she couldn't fix the problem either, and passed it off to the GSA and GSTL, who had both finally arrived in response to my original request. After the matter was taken care of, I told the GSTL that I was mortified by how she had behaved. Of course, being that she's an ETL, there's nothing to be done, but at least the GSTL knew my side of the story
 
Joined
Feb 18, 2016
Messages
1,654
How fast does she expect you to push a uboat?

The standard is push one case a minute, plus backstock and trash and whatever else is extra time (I factor 5 minutes per 20 cases for cleanup and guests, and on average it is reasonably close.) That standard is, IMO, fair for well sorted vehicles.

I have team members that think twice the standard is hard...so I'm cynical.
All depends on what is inside that box.
 
Joined
Jun 12, 2011
Messages
892
My last ETL was a twit. TLs have to be adaptable at spot because they get new bosses all the time. This little snot was the worst I have ever had and I had 27 over my time of service.She too "thought" you should be able to A B or C in x amount of time. Problem is, she never did it so had no concept of actually what it takes. She told me once that a POG TL should be able to do all of the planning while setting planos, there really wasnt that much to plan for. The look on her face when I handed her the stack of planos for Nov week 1 as I walked out was flipping priceless. The one thing I know for sure in life is you reap what you sow. And she is getting it back now. She is no longer the new, fresh ETL. There is someone newer and fresher and it grinds her beans. Suddenly she is no longer the star and the facade is starting to crack. She deserves every single bit of grief she has coming her way.
 
Joined
Feb 17, 2019
Messages
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  • #14
How fast does she expect you to push a uboat?

The standard is push one case a minute, plus backstock and trash and whatever else is extra time (I factor 5 minutes per 20 cases for cleanup and guests, and on average it is reasonably close.) That standard is, IMO, fair for well sorted vehicles.

I have team members that think twice the standard is hard...so I'm cynical.
She expects 30 seconds per box, but doesn't factor in what type of box. If it is chemicals, fine. If it is HBA or Kitchen/home that will take longer because of the packaging. A lot of the Uboats aren't well sorted either. If it is all in one aisle then I am so thankful, but a lot of times the stuff is all over the place. Maybe it's just me, but I doubt other people are pushing faster. A minute per box would be a dream for me.

Don't think to much on the TMs in that respect. Most are probably working as hard as they can. I know I work myself to the bone and it never seems good enough for my current TLs ridiculous standards.
 
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Joined
Feb 17, 2019
Messages
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  • #15
My last ETL was a twit. TLs have to be adaptable at spot because they get new bosses all the time. This little snot was the worst I have ever had and I had 27 over my time of service.She too "thought" you should be able to A B or C in x amount of time. Problem is, she never did it so had no concept of actually what it takes. She told me once that a POG TL should be able to do all of the planning while setting planos, there really wasnt that much to plan for. The look on her face when I handed her the stack of planos for Nov week 1 as I walked out was flipping priceless. The one thing I know for sure in life is you reap what you sow. And she is getting it back now. She is no longer the new, fresh ETL. There is someone newer and fresher and it grinds her beans. Suddenly she is no longer the star and the facade is starting to crack. She deserves every single bit of grief she has coming her way.
I am having that problem currently. I doubt she has ever pushed a box in her life, so she expects a lot of unrealistic things. And I feel like I can't tell her "it might take longer for this specific section" without her getting angry and saying I am making excuses, etc.
 
Joined
Jun 22, 2014
Messages
662
I have a toxic lead right now. They act fine around pretty much everyone but me and have made some very unprofessional comments towards me, despite having a background in HR. A peer is convinced that they feel intimidated because they are brand new to doing my workcenter whereas I have always been the TM/Captain that TMs, TLs, ETLs, and STLs came to with questions. A few weeks ago I spent my meal break hysterically crying in my car. Sounds ridiculous but that was when I finally snapped under the stress. Now what I do is I come in, I keep to myself, and I avoid them as much as possible. This worked semi well for about two weeks until they pulled me in for my review (thankfully written by my previous lead) where they made another unprofessional comment behind closed doors. It hurts because as irritated as I would get at work I still genuinely loved my department deep down, but now just being in the building is miserable. It's officially nothing more than a job where I clock in and clock out.

Document everything that you need to. Keep track of the way you are treated and of whether or not you are meeting best practice goals. I am fortunate enough that I have reports on Greenfield so I print those regularly in case they try to performance me out.

Also, start looking for better jobs. Somewhere that pays more, better scheduling, etc. This summer I hit my five years with Spot and as a personal goal I am determined to get there, but once I do that's hopefully it.
 
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Joined
Feb 17, 2019
Messages
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  • #18
I have a toxic lead right now. They act fine around pretty much everyone but me and have made some very unprofessional comments towards me, despite having a background in HR. A peer is convinced that they feel intimidated because they are brand new to doing my workcenter whereas I have always been the TM/Captain that TMs, TLs, ETLs, and STLs came to with questions. A few weeks ago I spent my meal break hysterically crying in my car. Sounds ridiculous but that was when I finally snapped under the stress. Now what I do is I come in, I keep to myself, and I avoid them as much as possible. This worked semi well for about two weeks until they pulled me in for my review (thankfully written by my previous lead) where they made another unprofessional comment behind closed doors. It hurts because as irritated as I would get at work I still genuinely loved my department deep down, but now just being in the building is miserable. It's officially nothing more than a job where I clock in and clock out.

Document everything that you need to. Keep track of the way you are treated and of whether or not you are meeting best practice goals. I am fortunate enough that I have reports on Greenfield so I print those regularly in case they try to performance me out.

Also, start looking for better jobs. Somewhere that pays more, better scheduling, etc. This summer I hit my five years with Spot and as a personal goal I am determined to get there, but once I do that's hopefully it.
Trust me, that is not ridiculous. I wake up every morning dreading my working day and my anxiety is extreme. Unfortunately for me, I can not avoid this person. They grab me quickly in the beginning of the day so I can be monitored in everything I do. I really don't know what to do about this at this current job. I'm looking for new jobs which sucks because I like everyone else at this Target. This one TL almost seems to want to force me out.
 
Joined
Sep 25, 2017
Messages
497
Ah, toxic bosses - I've had a few of those, at Target and elsewhere. They seem to enjoy making life miserable for others.
I agree with @hufflepuff about documenting everything; keep it factual, non-emotional, with dates, and if any other TMs were nearby and might have witnessed the interaction. Documentation might be necessary if you are forced out and file for unemployment.
Maybe start looking for another job, if only to help you know that there really are other options out there - and it might actually bear fruit!
 
Joined
Feb 27, 2016
Messages
151
I don't like the double standard that goes on in the stores. On 2 occasions I was told to stop talking and just work. Now mind you I was helping a new team member and just saying hi to some one else.
But god forbid I do that anymore. Was at GS one day getting reshop and the ETL-GS told the girls there not to talk to each other while guests are there but when they are no guests there they can talk all they want. I just looked at her like WTF!!!
So I just do my work and do not talk or answer any questions anymore unless talking to a guest. I feel so rude doing that. When I walk by the STL and 2 EL's I just turn my head and ignore them even if they say hello. I say sorry I cant talk gotta work.
 

buliSBI

Former Team Member
Joined
Jun 17, 2011
Messages
3,218
Sounds like a standard performancing scenario. If they can find one thing, they zone in on it till you quit or use against you.

Ask what the standard time is from other leads to work such tasks.
Start documenting your demanding leads goals.
 
Joined
Feb 18, 2016
Messages
1,654
Well it's an average. It takes more time to peg gum or candy and a lot less to put up candles. But on average for a whole truck, well sorted, that is what a good team can do.
The law of averages is the fallacious belief that a particular outcome or event is inevitable or certain simply because it is statistically possible.
 
Joined
Feb 17, 2019
Messages
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  • #25
Thank you for all the great comments. Today was okay in comparison, but still backbreaking. 40 minutes for a boat of 70+ boxes in HBA? I seriously can't do it that fast in my dreams.
And to add to the story of our relationship, months ago I questioned her expectations and she got angry, but I immediately told her (in a lot more words) "I'm sorry, you are right. It wasn't my intention to upset you". I have done nothing but work my butt off since then and have been extremely nice and complacent to her... I still have some good days and bad days depending on her mood.
 
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