Archived What should I do in this situation?

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Sep 30, 2011
So I'm in a little bit of a pickle. One of my co-workers I have been friendly with suddenly decides he likes me romantically. Which wouldn't normally be an issue if he hadn't said "oh I don't date inside of work" and I'm in a relationship, amongst other messy details of my non-Spot life. I have decided I want nothing to do with him, will not be speaking to him other than at work, as a co-worker, and only to maintain my "image"(basically I don't want the TLs thinking I'm suddenly incapable of teamwork and I'm suddenly a b*tch. Spot is the only thing consistently good in my life, so I can't mess with it).

Do I speak to my hardlines TLs and ask they keep him in distant sections? Do I say nothing until it becomes a problem at work? I'd feel incredibly bad telling the TLs who are already not fond of him, but then again, I know he's not a fantastic employee and he won't improve. I just don't want to try and zone with some little lost puppy dog following me around more than usual and then suddenly have ME on CA for it.
May 29, 2012
What have you already said to this TM? Have you told him you are not interested and he needs to back off?


Former Signing Ninja
Staff member
Jun 10, 2011
If the TM is a mensch than a short conversation about your feelings should be enough.
Sure he might be hurt and might continue to carry a torch for you but he will keep his distance and respect your feelings.

On the other hand if he's a dick than you will have to talk to somebody.
But I wouldn't do it unless it escalates to that.
Oct 5, 2012
Do what so many people fail to do in these situations. Tactfully, politely set very clear, very firm boundaries and expectations. Leave no guesswork out of whatever you say. Do it in an open area where there are people within eye shot or nearby at least.

I'm not interested in a relationship, other than a professional one with you.



What zen said... Just be very clear that you don't want a relationship. Don't say anything that might lead him on.

If hes smart he should back off and you won't need to talk to a TL... Otherwise if he still makes advances, you should talk to ETL-HR promptly.
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