New etl

Joined
Jan 27, 2020
Messages
695
Yup if you see me moving with a purpose I do not have time to talk. But if you insist I will break my stride and" have time to talk"/\tm

Like communicate in the beginning communicatw after my first break, communicate around lunch, and my last break and I'll check in out the door.

They are in natural lulls in my day, I can update you on my plans and what I've been doing, and you'll be able to provide in put then.
 
Joined
Sep 25, 2019
Messages
1,199
We'd discuss at length the price of onions in Tibet while pushing and zoning mustard and salad dressing. Mustard? yes, it's boring. Salad dressing? hell no, it's pure excitement.
 
Joined
Jun 8, 2011
Messages
32,066
Hey all. New Etl starting soon just want to know your honest opinion about the position and what the day to day kinda looks like, more or less. I come from years of retail so I know I what can happen to “plans” for the day. I want to do well so any info that would be helpful is appreciated.

oh I’m gonna be in specialty sales (beauty, tech and soft lines)
Any updates?
 

60SecondsRemaining

Former SrTL - Replen
Joined
Mar 21, 2014
Messages
723
Hey all. New Etl starting soon just want to know your honest opinion about the position and what the day to day kinda looks like, more or less. I come from years of retail so I know I what can happen to “plans” for the day. I want to do well so any info that would be helpful is appreciated.

oh I’m gonna be in specialty sales (beauty, tech and soft lines)
Ok listen up.

These guys are gonna tell you things like "listen to your team" and "remember where you came from."

That's all a bunch of lies. I put together this bulleted list for you to follow in order to become immediately successful at the ETL role.

- Immediately blow up any process that's in place and replace it with your own. Why do you think they replaced the person before you? They sucked. And by extension their processes sucked. Burn it with fire.

- Make sure you know never to leave the office. ETLs are to be heard, not seen. You should NEVER been seen on the salesfloor. Always use your walkie to ask things like "what's the status" and "we gotta get dem redcards".

- Lunch is important. Ensure you network with your fellow ETLs and STL by planning lunch in TSC. The earlier you can do this, the better. Planning lunch each day takes time. Do this EVERY day.

- You are an EXECUTIVE. You are important, says it in your title. Make sure you speak to the team with authority (only over the walkie) so they understand you are more important than they are.

- There is no such thing as "unrealistic expectations". Remember, there is a long line of unemployed people who want to get paid next to no money to work as hard as they possibly can and get no recognition for it. Failure of your team to put forth 200% effort all day every day is a trip to the unemployment line. Remind your team of this often so they don't forget.

- There is a bench somewhere. Make sure you tell your very best team members they are on it, so they work harder for the same amount of money. I'm not sure you can actually sit on this bench.

And finally the most important tip for being successful as an ETL, is to make sure you never take responsibility for anything yourself. Your team exists to shield you from your bad decisions. Throw them under the bus when you need to so that you can keep fighting the good fight. You are the Queen and they are the pawns, sacrifice them accordingly.

Follow my tips and you're sure to be an STL in no time.














Obviously this is sarcasm.
 

happygoth

reshop till I drop
Joined
Apr 17, 2019
Messages
3,468
Ok listen up.

These guys are gonna tell you things like "listen to your team" and "remember where you came from."

That's all a bunch of lies. I put together this bulleted list for you to follow in order to become immediately successful at the ETL role.

- Immediately blow up any process that's in place and replace it with your own. Why do you think they replaced the person before you? They sucked. And by extension their processes sucked. Burn it with fire.

- Make sure you know never to leave the office. ETLs are to be heard, not seen. You should NEVER been seen on the salesfloor. Always use your walkie to ask things like "what's the status" and "we gotta get dem redcards".

- Lunch is important. Ensure you network with your fellow ETLs and STL by planning lunch in TSC. The earlier you can do this, the better. Planning lunch each day takes time. Do this EVERY day.

- You are an EXECUTIVE. You are important, says it in your title. Make sure you speak to the team with authority (only over the walkie) so they understand you are more important than they are.

- There is no such thing as "unrealistic expectations". Remember, there is a long line of unemployed people who want to get paid next to no money to work as hard as they possibly can and get no recognition for it. Failure of your team to put forth 200% effort all day every day is a trip to the unemployment line. Remind your team of this often so they don't forget.

- There is a bench somewhere. Make sure you tell your very best team members they are on it, so they work harder for the same amount of money. I'm not sure you can actually sit on this bench.

And finally the most important tip for being successful as an ETL, is to make sure you never take responsibility for anything yourself. Your team exists to shield you from your bad decisions. Throw them under the bus when you need to so that you can keep fighting the good fight. You are the Queen and they are the pawns, sacrifice them accordingly.

Follow my tips and you're sure to be an STL in no time.














Obviously this is sarcasm.
OMG I'm rolling. This should be stickied.
 
Joined
Nov 18, 2017
Messages
203
Ok listen up.

These guys are gonna tell you things like "listen to your team" and "remember where you came from."

That's all a bunch of lies. I put together this bulleted list for you to follow in order to become immediately successful at the ETL role.

- Immediately blow up any process that's in place and replace it with your own. Why do you think they replaced the person before you? They sucked. And by extension their processes sucked. Burn it with fire.

- Make sure you know never to leave the office. ETLs are to be heard, not seen. You should NEVER been seen on the salesfloor. Always use your walkie to ask things like "what's the status" and "we gotta get dem redcards".

- Lunch is important. Ensure you network with your fellow ETLs and STL by planning lunch in TSC. The earlier you can do this, the better. Planning lunch each day takes time. Do this EVERY day.

- You are an EXECUTIVE. You are important, says it in your title. Make sure you speak to the team with authority (only over the walkie) so they understand you are more important than they are.

- There is no such thing as "unrealistic expectations". Remember, there is a long line of unemployed people who want to get paid next to no money to work as hard as they possibly can and get no recognition for it. Failure of your team to put forth 200% effort all day every day is a trip to the unemployment line. Remind your team of this often so they don't forget.

- There is a bench somewhere. Make sure you tell your very best team members they are on it, so they work harder for the same amount of money. I'm not sure you can actually sit on this bench.

And finally the most important tip for being successful as an ETL, is to make sure you never take responsibility for anything yourself. Your team exists to shield you from your bad decisions. Throw them under the bus when you need to so that you can keep fighting the good fight. You are the Queen and they are the pawns, sacrifice them accordingly.

Follow my tips and you're sure to be an STL in no time.














Obviously this is sarcasm.
I can't love this enough!
 

redeye58

Hasta Ba Rista, Baby!
Joined
Jun 9, 2011
Messages
20,207
Ok listen up.

These guys are gonna tell you things like "listen to your team" and "remember where you came from."

That's all a bunch of lies. I put together this bulleted list for you to follow in order to become immediately successful at the ETL role.

- Immediately blow up any process that's in place and replace it with your own. Why do you think they replaced the person before you? They sucked. And by extension their processes sucked. Burn it with fire.

- Make sure you know never to leave the office. ETLs are to be heard, not seen. You should NEVER been seen on the salesfloor. Always use your walkie to ask things like "what's the status" and "we gotta get dem redcards".

- Lunch is important. Ensure you network with your fellow ETLs and STL by planning lunch in TSC. The earlier you can do this, the better. Planning lunch each day takes time. Do this EVERY day.

- You are an EXECUTIVE. You are important, says it in your title. Make sure you speak to the team with authority (only over the walkie) so they understand you are more important than they are.

- There is no such thing as "unrealistic expectations". Remember, there is a long line of unemployed people who want to get paid next to no money to work as hard as they possibly can and get no recognition for it. Failure of your team to put forth 200% effort all day every day is a trip to the unemployment line. Remind your team of this often so they don't forget.

- There is a bench somewhere. Make sure you tell your very best team members they are on it, so they work harder for the same amount of money. I'm not sure you can actually sit on this bench.

And finally the most important tip for being successful as an ETL, is to make sure you never take responsibility for anything yourself. Your team exists to shield you from your bad decisions. Throw them under the bus when you need to so that you can keep fighting the good fight. You are the Queen and they are the pawns, sacrifice them accordingly.

Follow my tips and you're sure to be an STL in no time.














Obviously this is sarcasm.
You forgot the sarcasm font.
 

60SecondsRemaining

Former SrTL - Replen
Joined
Mar 21, 2014
Messages
723
Obviously.
thor im hilarious GIF
 

SilentCrow

ETL-Remodel
Joined
Sep 6, 2014
Messages
457
Focus on building a strong team that can approach you , listen, ask for advice, and you’ll be fine. Support your team most of all. Don’t be that snob that feels like getting your hands dirty is beneath you. You’ll create a team that won’t care about you with that attitude. You’re literally only as good as your team so I always say make that your focus. Metrics and things fall into place once you have the buy in from your team.

Plan plan plan.
 
Top