"Are you sick? You are? OK bring in a doctor's note when you're in next".
I've had coworkers call out before, then immediately post/get tagged on Facebook about a party or other activity... Which the Team Lead that night then saw. Awesome way to get written up right there. :hang2::facepalm:
You could always say your car won't start.
Of course, it can't start if you don't put the keys in it.