Dating

[NerdyMakeupGrl]

So I am a STL and I have totally fallen for a TM at my store; is that against policy if we were to start dating.

 

[Dead and Khaki]

It HAS been a bit since we've had some good troll fic around here.

 

[Captain Orca]

I am a technically oriented able to fly senior who has fallen for our dog. He's so mellow I can brush his teeth. Oh what shall I do?

 

[MrT]

So I am a STL and I have totally fallen for a TM at my store; is that against policy if we were to start dating.

OK I'll bite and answer your question. Don't do it. It is not strictly against policy but it will not look good. It could be argued that as a leader and probably a key holder you would be considered there boss at one time or another and against the policy.

 

[Hardlinesmaster]

Don't do it.

 

[Captain Orca]

Not a good idea to fool around at work. No matter how sly both parties are it will get out and things will get ugly.

 

[lucidtm]

I was wondering when CP would be back!

 

[NerdyMakeupGrl]

Not a good idea to fool around at work. No matter how sly both parties are it will get out and things will get ugly.

What do you think might happen?

 

[NerdyMakeupGrl]

OK I'll bite and answer your question. Don't do it. It is not strictly against policy but it will not look good. It could be argued that as a leader and probably a key holder you would be considered there boss at one time or another and against the policy.

So what do you think would happen to me? We have sorta already been texting a lot and hanging out on our breaks together . . .

 

[Yaz Pistasio]

The Golden Rule: 5 Reasons You Should Never Sh*t Where You Eat

There's a universal saying that goes: "Don't shit where you eat." And no, I'm not talking about going number 2 on your dining room floor when you stumble

www.readunwritten.com

 

[MrT]

So what do you think would happen to me? We have sorta already been texting a lot and hanging out on our breaks together . . .

Depends on a lot of things do they report to you then that is a hard no. If they don't depends on how your store feels about it. Some people might feel petty and try and get you in trouble. If you Date ajd you break up and it will look worse for you as the leader. It is not a good idea but you won't be the first or the last leader to date a TM. I just had a leader quit that was dating a TM. I now have another leader dating a TM and it's even more awkward because they are now the boss of an ex gf they had before becoming a leader.

 

[Ashfromoldsite]

So I am a STL and I have totally fallen for a TM at my store; is that against policy if we were to start dating.

Ya sure you are.

 

[Ashfromoldsite]

Hell you’re the stl. You can make up your own rules for your store. Go for it!!

 

[Ashfromoldsite]

CARTOON PENGUIN REINCARNATED.

 

[MrT]

Hell you’re the stl. You can make up your own rules for your store. Go for it!!

I assumed they meant it as specialty tl I don't think most people even know that stl was what the old SDs were called anymore

 

[Zxy123456]

Hello Cartoon penguin!!!

 

[Ashfromoldsite]

I assumed they meant it as specialty tl I don't think most people even know that stl was what the old SDs were called anymore

No

 

[Hardlinesmaster]

So what do you think would happen to me? We have sorta already been texting a lot and hanging out on our breaks together . . .

Spot will catch you. Ask @TheClopen.

 

[Black Sheep 214]

Nobody is sly enough to keep these relationships under wraps, but they do provide fuel for the store grapevine and practically endless entertainment and speculation for the store team while they watch the perpetrators engage in their subterfuge. Nothing is more entertaining than those “secrets“ that everyone actually knows about. I say practically endless entertainment, because when these relationships are discovered by or reported to higher ups, the whole thing comes to a crashing halt in a quick minute. Except for the gossip, which goes on forever.🍿🍿🍿

 

[TheClopen]

Nobody is sly enough to keep these relationships under wraps, but they do provide fuel for the store grapevine and practically endless entertainment and speculation for the store team while they watch the perpetrators engage in their subterfuge. Nothing is more entertaining than those “secrets“ that everyone actually knows about. I say practically endless entertainment, because when these relationships are discovered by or reported to higher ups, the whole thing comes to a crashing halt in a quick minute. Except for the gossip, which goes on forever.🍿🍿🍿

I've doubt with all of this, the gossip and rumors are really what takes you down. People can't keep their dam mouths shut. Then they think they know s^^t from rumors and gossip when really they don't know a dam thing, then they go and spread false information.

 

[Captain Orca]

Do your break room coffee with acquaintances, slam down some store bought Entenmans donuts and don't dip the pen in the company ink well. Grow up.

 

[TheClopen]

@NerdyMakeupGrl
Take a look. I attached the management chain from the girl TM I was dating. You can see clearly on the Workday end she doesn't report to me & has her own ETl & TL, but that doesn't really matter.
Target is willing to break its own policy to fire you if they want to. Especially if you're in an "At Will" employment state like I am. They don't need a reason to fire you.
But if you're interested, my reason was "Detrimental Conduct," which, according to the SD, you don't get a final or anything it's straight terminated, which is what the HRBP told him. But ASANTS plays here, too; it really depends on your district management and how they choose to handle it. But if your leaders can help it tell them to keep it in store walls. DO NOT let the information get to the HRBP, DSD or any higher-ups. it WON'T END WELL. Trust me I know.. lol

For some weird reason you can also see in the screenshot that I'm still not terminated but that's a whole other issue, for some reason no one is terminating me in Workday which is odd, possibly because I filled hotline reports against my store for breaking their own "Dating Policy" even though technically they didn't break any "State" laws.
I also tried to get a lawyer to help fight my case but because of "At Will" employment, there was nothing they could do. However, it is odd that the girl still gets to keep her job and I get fired, you would think to be fair both of us would have been terminated rather than just one, but that's not how Target decided to do it...

It was partially our fault tho as when we were dating, rather than telling the ETL HR & SD we choose to keep it a secret for the first 3 months, then we both came out and told the truth but by that time, it was too late and everyone already knew. So we looked bad for lying when we said we were "Just Friends" as they did ask us once or twice before if the rumors were true and we said no... This was a mistake...
The SD really wanted me terminated due to the lying to him but he also stated it was due to dating the team member. Keep in mind the SD was able to get away with this because it's an "At Will" Employment state BUT in reality, lying to a superior is not against any rule in the handbook & dating a team member is also NOT against the rule, so long as they don't report to you. It states this directly in the policy I attached.

I would not sacrifice a possible husband/wife just because of stupid work rules, Target can go to Hell for trying to stop humans from naturally conversing with one another and being in relationships, I personally wouldn't let anyone stop me from doing that because you never know if they're "The One" and I won't sacrifice that chance for a job.

If you do choose to continue the relationship, here's what I recommend you do there's 3 options here.

Option A: If they do directly report to you such as if you're a style TL and their a style TM for example I would immediately bring the relationship up to your ETL & the ETL HR so they can either transfer one either to another store or department or rotate your shifts so you never work together. For instance, one works nights one works mornings.

Option B: If the TM does not report to you for example you're a GM TL & They're a Style Team member. You're good there's no policy broken here. But to be safe if you believe a relationship is forming I would just let the ETL HR know and maybe your ETL so they can move shifts just so there can never be any conflict of interest or schedule you during a time when there are other leaders present in the building like mornings or mid-day so that way the team member never reports to you because there are always other leaders present.

Option C: If you're not in the relationship yet; I want you to sit down and ask you're self some things which is what I did when I was in my relationship.
* Is this relationship worth me possibly losing my job for love?
* Do I really like this person?
* Is dating this person really something I want to do for the chance of love?

If you answered yes to any of these, follow options A & B. Also I would try to keep the SD & Higher-Ups like DSD & HRBP out of the situation. I would stick by your ETL & ETL HR side at first unless they feel the SD needs to know. The less the SD knows to possibly report to his boss (Like mines did) the better.

 

[happygoth]

Everybody always against workplace dating around here, pffft! I met my husband at my old retail job. And I worked in Loss Prevention at the time. Employees were hooking up left and right, including leaders and security.

True story, but OP things could get sticky and there's a lot to consider. If you are their direct supervisor there could be issues. I wouldn't give it a hard no, but tread lightly. I agree with Clopen, you have to decide whether taking this chance is worth the possibility of losing your job.

 

[Yaz Pistasio]

Do your break room coffee with acquaintances, slam down some store bought Entenmans donuts and don't dip the pen in the company ink well. Grow up.

 

[Yaz Pistasio]

I've doubt with all of this, the gossip and rumors are really what takes you down. People can't keep their dam mouths shut. Then they think they know s^^t from rumors and gossip when really they don't know a dam thing, then they go and spread false information.

I live in the south…I’m one to keep to myself…I hear EVERYTHING ….Them southerners know how to dig dirt and string a line…lol