"I need a fishing license" I'm sorry but we don't issue those, there are a few sporting goods stores in the area. (as I was pushing frozen one fine Sunday morning)
The coffee addiction. How about Target getting whole bean coffee grinders on the floor in P-Fresh? Wegmans has them and they are kept fairly clean and tidy. Problem would be grinding flavored beans in the regular bean grinder. Karens wouldn't follow the rules.