No baby sitter

Joined
Mar 19, 2018
Messages
36
Good day all, this question is for those who are taking LoA because they dont have somebody to take care of their kids.

my daughter is 10. And i thought she gonna be okay by herself with her virtual class. I have cameras at home so I can watch her and everything but i caught her looking pornography and im really concerned about cuz she is a minor. She also talking to other people online too that i ddnt know. So i decided to take an LOA so I can focus on her. My question is do you think I can get unemployment while im in LoA with Target? I cant afford to pay bills if im not working nor a baby sitter.
 

buliSBI

Former Team Member
Joined
Jun 17, 2011
Messages
3,453
Off of the Target related stuff, I work in Computer Forensics/IT Security. I will warn you that such behavior will continue even if you are home.

Is this on a family computer or school provided computer?
Is the computer in their room or in a common area? Common area is very recommended.
Start learning how to access Browser Internet History to monitor and look when behavior started.
Parental control software may provide some restrictions to sites and software. I would really recommend you take the computer somewhere to have the system setup with very limited permissions and policies. Make a very limited account for your kid and make yourself an Admin with a very complex Password. Setup firewall rules and policies to block apps and sites your kid should not be on.
Turn off or uninstall anything you don't want them to access.

Best thing to do is to talk (not lecture) to your child. Find out the source of said behavior or sites. Did she learn it from other kids or did she encounter someone on the Internet. Possibly get teachers and school counselor involved. Are they buillied or teased. Make sure you aware of all their accounts and passwords.

Also check with local churches and community orgs, some are opening their doors to help facilitate kids who are remote learning.
 
Joined
Mar 9, 2019
Messages
225
In my state you can get unemployment for corona virus reasons and staying home with elderly or children. The way you are stating it wouldn’t work because you are staying home for behavior issues and it would need to be that she can’t be home alone during corona or something to that nature.
 
Joined
May 13, 2019
Messages
392
Good thing you took leave. These days kids can access even with restrictions and she could have easily found a way to shut off the cameras and talk to pedophiles and run off with one without you knowing.
 
Joined
Jun 11, 2018
Messages
2,562
My son who’s 11 watched a certain video once. He has an iPad anything he watches shows up on my phone anything he might subscribe I see it on my phone As for communicating with anyone online he has no access or account for it not even on his xbox or switch ( classmates that I know only )Anyway so one day he watched a certain video and I knew but didn’t say anything I waited to see how long it would take him to confess.. No longer than 16 hours. I was putting him to bed and he kept crying and crying and I was like what’s wrong , all he can mumble as he was crying was that he felt guilty because he watched a naked girl. And I was like okay you are a boy you are curious but what made you curios was my reply. The girls at school kept saying penis ( which obviously he knew what it was) so he was curious how a private part for a female looks like so he went on google and typed in naked girl and long and behold videos shows up , but it wasn’t like a soft porno video instead his first video was full on bondage . My kid was traumatized for weeks after , even taking him to the pool made him very uncomfortable . So I guess my thing is parents needs to have these talk with their kids be it boy or girls , curiosity is in everything but having a open conversation. The rule i have for my son is , he better tell me before I find out from someone else and that includes his dad , because if he comes to me first I promised that I won’t get mad or upset , however if I find out from someone else then my parole officer hasn’t even been born yet😎
 
Joined
Apr 10, 2020
Messages
26
Good day all, this question is for those who are taking LoA because they dont have somebody to take care of their kids.

my daughter is 10. And i thought she gonna be okay by herself with her virtual class. I have cameras at home so I can watch her and everything but i caught her looking pornography and im really concerned about cuz she is a minor. She also talking to other people online too that i ddnt know. So i decided to take an LOA so I can focus on her. My question is do you think I can get unemployment while im in LoA with Target? I cant afford to pay bills if im not working nor a baby sitter.

Hopefully you weren’t too tough on her. We’ve all been that age before. Anyway, I don’t know why anyone would use the laugh emoji at your post. Hope it all works out for you though.
 
Joined
Dec 11, 2011
Messages
388
Kids sneak porn behind their parents back. Its a thing. You can't really stop it, time for the parental talks. Endorse a healthy attitude so she doesn't look elsewhere for her questions and curiosity.
 

Nauzhror

Service Advocate, Formerly GSA
Joined
Dec 29, 2013
Messages
2,168
Parental control software may provide some restrictions to sites and software. I would really recommend you take the computer somewhere to have the system setup with very limited permissions and policies. Make a very limited account for your kid and make yourself an Admin with a very complex Password. Setup firewall rules and policies to block apps and sites your kid should not be on.
Turn off or uninstall anything you don't want them to access.

If the child is tech savvy at all, none of this is going to work. As such I'd consider it the wrong route. Trying to control their actions is much less useful than trying to educate them to be safe online.

My mother took a route similar to this. All it resulted in was me putting a keylogger on the computer, getting her password, and logging in as her from then on instead of using my "restricted" account.
 
Joined
Jun 11, 2018
Messages
2,562
If the child is tech savvy at all, none of this is going to work.
😂 my son actually deleted all cookies and history before I asked to see his iPad to see what video he watched unbeknownst to him that I see everything he does on iPad on my phone. But he went on to explain me the scene as he was sobbing ( which I already saw) and explained to him that what he watched is not normal or that everyone does it. It was a scene with ball gag and all 😂. He cried for a week that’s how traumatized he was by what he has seen.
 

Nauzhror

Service Advocate, Formerly GSA
Joined
Dec 29, 2013
Messages
2,168
No clue at what age I first saw online porn. Probably older than 10, but hard to remember ages of events that were that long ago.
 
Joined
Jun 11, 2018
Messages
2,562
My concern is your daughter's viewing habits is not curiosity. There are adults that will groom.
I agree with you. How does a 10 year old have an account to talk to people online? I mean I’m not stupid I know how they can get one but as a mom to a 11 year old who does not even own a phone , and the iPad that he owns is linked to my account , as well as his xbox and switch .
But the fact that the daughter is talking to other people online and then watches it sure is the tale of a grooming process.
 

Yetive

Servant of 2 Masters
Joined
Feb 3, 2016
Messages
6,146
I suppose this is the modern equivalent of finding your dad's stash of Playboy magazines, or The Joy of Sex, but much scarier. The first bachelorette party I planned we had to rent a projector and porno movies-- that's right kids--no video players nor video stores, let alone internet.
 
Joined
Jun 11, 2011
Messages
1,686
Good day all, this question is for those who are taking LoA because they dont have somebody to take care of their kids.

my daughter is 10. And i thought she gonna be okay by herself with her virtual class. I have cameras at home so I can watch her and everything but i caught her looking pornography and im really concerned about cuz she is a minor. She also talking to other people online too that i ddnt know. So i decided to take an LOA so I can focus on her. My question is do you think I can get unemployment while im in LoA with Target? I cant afford to pay bills if im not working nor a baby sitter.
Lmao no because you are not unemployed.
 

Tessa120

Current game: Kenshi
Joined
Mar 17, 2017
Messages
4,817
Last year when the world was normal your daughter was 9. What care options did you have set up for her during those times? Why not set them back up now?

Also, why not lock down the internet? Router off during non-classwork time, all sites except approved sites blocked, non-administrator account only. Being only 10, she may not be able to find the holes in the security blanket.
 
Joined
Mar 19, 2018
Messages
36
Last year when the world was normal your daughter was 9. What care options did you have set up for her during those times? Why not set them back up now?

Also, why not lock down the internet? Router off during non-classwork time, all sites except approved sites blocked, non-administrator account only. Being only 10, she may not be able to find the holes in the security blanket.
Well i have few stories to tell, im not originally from the US and my husband passed 2018 while i was pregnant with the 2nd child. I had my mom with me since 2012 but had to bring my mom back home and my baby but she passed away too this July. Now its literally me and my daughter, i guess i have trusted my daughter so much cuz she always in the honor roll since she started school and even now she in virtual class she still Ace it. and I ddnt think she would do anything those kind of stuff. And now i know I really have to do something about it, I talked to her an md gave her internet limitations and monitor her as much as i can.
 
Joined
Mar 19, 2018
Messages
36
Hopefully you weren’t too tough on her. We’ve all been that age before. Anyway, I don’t know why anyone would use the laugh emoji at your post. Hope it all works out for you though.
Thank you for that, I asked a serious question in here and trying to figure out what should i do. Im a single parent and trying my best for my kids.
 

Tessa120

Current game: Kenshi
Joined
Mar 17, 2017
Messages
4,817
Well i have few stories to tell, im not originally from the US and my husband passed 2018 while i was pregnant with the 2nd child. I had my mom with me since 2012 but had to bring my mom back home and my baby but she passed away too this July. Now its literally me and my daughter, i guess i have trusted my daughter so much cuz she always in the honor roll since she started school and even now she in virtual class she still Ace it. and I ddnt think she would do anything those kind of stuff. And now i know I really have to do something about it, I talked to her an md gave her internet limitations and monitor her as much as i can.
I'm so sorry.
 

Nauzhror

Service Advocate, Formerly GSA
Joined
Dec 29, 2013
Messages
2,168
I agree with you. How does a 10 year old have an account to talk to people online?
I wouldn't consider this unusual at all.
I played MUDs (text-based precursor to MMORPG's like World of Warcraft, Everquest, etc.) when I was 9. I'm in my 30's, kids that age talking to people online is surely way more common nowadays than it was 20+ years ago.
 
Joined
Sep 15, 2011
Messages
1,408
Good day all, this question is for those who are taking LoA because they dont have somebody to take care of their kids.

my daughter is 10. And i thought she gonna be okay by herself with her virtual class. I have cameras at home so I can watch her and everything but i caught her looking pornography and im really concerned about cuz she is a minor. She also talking to other people online too that i ddnt know. So i decided to take an LOA so I can focus on her. My question is do you think I can get unemployment while im in LoA with Target? I cant afford to pay bills if im not working nor a baby sitter.

i would be more concerned with her behavior than worrying about the time off stuff and figuring out what is causing that but I hope you are able to figure everything out. Kids are crafty they will find a way with the internet or electronics although maybe not at age 10..im not sure. Def have an honest conversation with her and hopefully can have an open talk about everything going on. I would worry way more about the people you dont know she is talking to over the porn. People can be very manipulative

I hope you can figure out the financial stuff if you decide to stay on LOA though and I dont blame you with how crazy this year has been and potentially leaving a 10 year old at home by themself anyway
 
Last edited:
Joined
Nov 17, 2020
Messages
2
I have to leave my son with a babby sitter because he is very naughty. When a month ago I accidentally saw an open page of a porn site on his laptop, I was shocked. I had a serious conversation with him about it, but I think he continues to visit porn sites.
 
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