The Things Guests Do/Pet Peeves Thread

My GSTL wants us to ask this so we can make more sales. He hopes they say no if they really didn't find everything they wanted and won't just be polite and say "yes". If the guest couldn't find it and we have it in stock we will go grab it. There are usually a lot of lanes open so we can wait and chit-chat with the guest. Or if it is busy we finish that transaction and tell them to wait at Photo for said items/s. It is just takes a a minute or two.

This is not reality. Who's chit chatting with the guest while the cashier is running around getting the items? If the item is in the back part of the store, how can it possibly take 120 seconds or less while the cashier looks for something in an area he or she is not familiar with?
 
  1. Guests who come to SCO, stare at the "scan an item to begin" message for a whole minute, start touching the screen and ignore the sweet voice that reiterates the same instruction, and flags me down to ask what to do.
  2. Guests who come to SCO and hand me their stuff and go, "you do it, I'm in a hurry." Fuck you; go to an actual lane!
  3. Guests who leave their hangers at SCO on the register bed instead of THE HUGE RED FUCKING BIN WITH A PICTURE OF A HANGER ON IT.
  4. Guests at regular lanes who empty their hand basket onto the belt and then throw the basket under the belt or put it on top of the soda fridge.
  5. Guests at SCO who won't move out of in front of the register when I approach them to clear the error message or check their ID for alcohol. Sure, Frank, let me just type my shit from four feet away.
 
At least they empty their baskets! I'm short and it's really quite difficult to reach up and over the side of the stuffed basket to get everything out.
Yeah, those who don't empty it are really lazy. Same goes for people who buy totes/hampers/trash cans/etc.

A few days ago, some dude bought a ton of school supplies. Erasers, pens, pencils, small stuff that fit inside the totes we sell in the Bullseye's Playground (dollar section), which he filled with the aforementioned items.
He's on his phone, doesn't even respond to my, "have you heard of Target Red?" spiel at all, so I start scanning the items in the first tote, set them to the side, then take the tote and put it in the bag and stack the items inside the tote (now inside the bag). Figured, hey, this will make it look neat and gives the bag a nice shape and all, and it takes me no extra effort.

Get to the end, 6 or 7 totes later. I total the transaction, announce the total, he finally looks up from his idiotphone, and looks at the belt frantically. "Where are the bins?"
- 'In the bags with the items.'
- "I do not want the bins. They are just for shopping."
- (internal long sigh followed by best attempt to ensure facial expression isn't reflective of frustration); take the totes out and leave the items in the bag; void all the totes
- "Can you double-bag these all?"
- (longer, internal sigh) 'Sure.'
 
  1. Guests who come to SCO, stare at the "scan an item to begin" message for a whole minute, start touching the screen and ignore the sweet voice that reiterates the same instruction, and flags me down to ask what to do.
  2. Guests who come to SCO and hand me their stuff and go, "you do it, I'm in a hurry." Fuck you; go to an actual lane!
  3. Guests who leave their hangers at SCO on the register bed instead of THE HUGE RED FUCKING BIN WITH A PICTURE OF A HANGER ON IT.
  4. Guests at regular lanes who empty their hand basket onto the belt and then throw the basket under the belt or put it on top of the soda fridge.
  5. Guests at SCO who won't move out of in front of the register when I approach them to clear the error message or check their ID for alcohol. Sure, Frank, let me just type my shit from four feet away.
Lol for 2 I say I’m sorry, I have to watch all these to make sure no errors pop up. A team member at a lane would be happy to ring you up.
4 at my store we encourage guests to put the baskets at the end of the belt by the coolers
 
Guests who leave their hangers at SCO on the register bed instead of THE HUGE RED FUCKING BIN WITH A PICTURE OF A HANGER ON IT.

We don't have any of those bins at the moment. Guests kept ramming into them with carts or dropping 35 lb tubs of kitty litter on them, and they're all broken. We've gotten replacements a couple times, so I suspect the outage is temporary.
 
We don't have any of those bins at the moment. Guests kept ramming into them with carts or dropping 35 lb tubs of kitty litter on them, and they're all broken. We've gotten replacements a couple times, so I suspect the outage is temporary.
The new translucent plastic ones are much less susceptible to damage
 
1. Guest who let their kids run wild and destroy an isle that was just zoned
2. Guest who pick up and item and then drop it wherever the hell they want when they change their minds.
3. The ones who go “Are you sure?” after I confirm with my device that we don’t have anymore in the back. Yeah, I’m sure.
4. The ones who bitch about boxes in the isle. How the f do they think stuff gets on the shelf?
5. Oh you’re pushing a 500lb pallet of La Croix? Let me stop you to ask you a ridiculous question and watch you struggle to get going again
6. Oh you want me to move my cart so you can get by with that pallet? Nope. I’ll chill here in the middle of the isle until my reunion is over.
7. The ones who stare at a full shelf of the SAME item and aren’t sure which one to get.

I could go on and on. Customer service isn’t my strong point.
 
SCO has to be one of the circles of hell. Standing all day in one spot, nothing to do with your hands, only walking distance is a teeny circle, and having to watch multiple people at once struggle with the computer, trying to decide if they need help, if they need to be left alone, if they are trying to be sneaky, if they are trying to cause a distraction to pull your vision from someone else.
 
I actually do walk a lot when I'm at SCO. Even if it's just pacing between the four terminals. But if there's a lull in guests (yes, it happens on occasion), I'm over in the dreaded Playground working out a pull, reshop or zoning, or I'm putting away carts that guests dump just at the end of the SCO area.
 
In my cashier days I vastly preferred hearing "you look bored" and "haha it must be free" over "REEEEEEEE WHY THE FUCK DON'T YOU HAVE (ITEM) IN STOCK THIS IS BULLSHIT REEEEEEEE!!!!!!!". I'll take the first two every fuckin day.
And here I thought I wanted to go hardlines/softlines. Okay, I'll stay up front scanning my life away lol
 
The reeeeeing was front end though. As a cashier you’re usually the last person they interact with on their way out, so that means you’re the most likely to hear about it from pissed off people.
That's why I don't ask them, "did you find everything okay/that you were looking for?" ;)
 
That's why I don't ask them, "did you find everything okay/that you were looking for?" ;)

Me neither.

I try to make small talk with the guest about their purchases. Pet food, "Oh, what do you have, how long have you had it,etc.. Kids toys: birthday, for your child, grandchild, etc. I try to make them feel good about what they're buying. But never, ever going to hold up the line by asking that question. Now if the guest asks about finding an item, that's different.
 
Me neither.

I try to make small talk with the guest about their purchases. Pet food, "Oh, what do you have, how long have you had it,etc.. Kids toys: birthday, for your child, grandchild, etc. I try to make them feel good about what they're buying. But never, ever going to hold up the line by asking that question. Now if the guest asks about finding an item, that's different.
My routine goes like this:
  1. Guest walks up to lane: "Hello, how are you?"
  2. Start scan-and-bag batch script (mindless_cashier.bat) and make no further communication until they are in front of me
  3. Guest directly in front of me, make eye contact, "have you heard of Target Red?"; Wait for "yes" (great_thanks.wav); "no, shut up, I don't care" (no_problem.mp3), or "no, but tell me more because I care or because I know it's your job to try to push this shit on me and I won't fight you about it and I'll politely pretend to be interested" (this_is_how_it_works.ogg)
  4. Silence
  5. "Your total is <dollars_cents>"
  6. "You saved <saved_amount> with us today."
  7. Have a great <appropriate_dismissal_dependent_on_time_of_day>!"
 
Here's another guest type that pisses me off:

Place-one-item-on-the-belt-at-a-time Sally. Because she's too busy either scanning shit for Cartwheel or just browsing her phone.
This. I don’t mind scanning cartwheel at the belt as long as you don’t interrupt my flow. Once you start taking things out of bags or off the belt just as I am putting them in the bag I suspend the transaction and say “if you’d like to scan with cartwheel, that’s totally fine but to keep the line moving I’m going to help the next guest while you do”
 
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